The Travel Tart
Offbeat Tales From A Travel Addict

The Mile High Club – How To Join It!

Probably one of the biggest holy grails for horny travellers is becoming a member of the ‘Mile High Club’ – that is, being able to carry out the amorous act of sexual intercourse on a plane, usually in the rather unromantic place of the aircraft toilets.

It’s like taking public sex to new heights, pardon the pun.. 🙂

I’m not sure what the appeal of undertaking one of natures most primal acts in a small space that’s lit up like a late night convenience store where hundreds of people have emptied their bladders and bowels before you – but hey, it’s horses for courses!

I can barely fit myself into the rest rooms – let alone, try and want to recreate the karma sutra 30,000 feet up!

I think it’s about the element of risk and the potential for being caught that makes adventurous types want to join the mile high club!

Sometimes, it might be people who have been together for a while, or for some lucky few, they may have picked up on the flight itself – maybe even one of the cabin crew with some witty chat up line(s)!

And no, those who have undertaken the ‘solo mile high club’ don’t count..

Legend has it that the inventor of the autopilot system, Lawrence Burst Sperry, was the first member of the club because having a plane fly itself ‘frees up’ a pilot to do other things! Actually, November 2016 will be the 100th anniversary of his pioneering deed!

Famous people who have admitted to being a part of the club include Richard Branson, Johnny Depp and Gwyneth Paltrow.

However, probably the most famous mile high club ‘incident’ in travel history was when very famous actor Ralph Fiennes had it off with a cabin crew member on a Qantas flight between Darwin and Mumbai in 2007.

It created a stir everywhere and made the front pages of newspapers around the world. The woman involved in the tryst ended up not working for the airline any more after the media storm which was a bit unfortunate, but I’m guessing having a steamy interlude with a famous passenger probably wasn’t part of the rules!

Of course, the internet also went crazy, which of course, led to inevitable parodies like this one…

Mile High Club - Airlines

I’m not sure if this was an official piss take from a rival airline, but either way, it’s still funny!

I had a good think about this. If there is such a demand for getting it off on a plane, that sounds like a golden opportunity for the airlines to make some money from it!

But having said that, if it was all made ‘legal’, that would probably take the fun out of it for many people!

Anyway, I digress!

However, I’ve thought of some silly ‘code sentences’ or pick up lines that you can use to entice your partner – or even an entire stranger, into a romp onboard the aircraft toilets!

Here they are!

How to join the Mile High Club with these silly ‘lavatory lovin’ lines!

  1. I can show you first class without ever setting foot into that section!
  2. Are you flying to Australia? I’m always going down under.
  3. According the the bathroom signs, the lights are off and nobody is home.
  4. I have more thrust than all of the engines on this plane put together.
  5. Would you like to see me in the upright position?
  6. I’d love to help you recline.
  7. Do you know that since we’re crossing a few time zones, we could literally have it off exactly at the same time more than once.
  8. Yes, my carry on baggage is oversized.
  9. (After writing your name on the arrival port area of the boarding pass). Wow, it looks like that I’m your final destination.
  10. Are you into one flight stands?
  11. Do you think we’d both fit in the bathroom?
  12. You have no idea how many times I’ve cross checked you out already.
  13. What kind of holding pattern do you like the best?
  14. Sierra Echo Xray November Oscar Whiskey?
  15. When I first saw you, I just wanted to drop my payload.
  16. Want to join me in the bathroom for a repositioning flight?
  17. I’m a pilot. Marry me and you’ll fly free!
  18. I can definitely take you to new heights!
  19. Mind if I park my plane in your hangar? and finally
  20. I go down more than the planes on Air Crash Investigations!

I’m going to throw this one out there – anyone reading this joined the Mile High Club? And which pick up lines did you find successful?

If you have, let us know your best tips! ;P

 

About Anthony The Travel Tart

The Travel Tart writes about the funny, offbeat and weird aspects of world travel today. Travel wasn't meant to be taken too seriously! Check out ways to say hi below or sign up for his silly newsletter!

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2 Comments

  1. Frequent Flyer Frequent Flyer
    August 10, 2015    

    Ha ha, I’ll have to give these a go to see if they work!

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