Today I have an article from Bryan Richards about the Great Conch Republic Drag Race in Key West, Florida.
This isn’t exactly a race involving high octane performance from souped up cars! It’s about an experience Bryan’s dad seemed to enjoy on a visit to Key West!
Bryan runs The Wandering Gourmand, which is a travel blog about beer and food, which is something literally close to my heart…when this stuff passes through it!
Anyway, say hi to Bryan on Twitter and Facebook. Here it is!
A drag race without cars?
It was my Dad’s retirement, and he wanted to drive his Corvette from Youngstown, Ohio (Don’t worry, you shouldn’t know where that is) to Key West, Florida (You should know where that is). That’s about 2,800 miles (4,500 km) in a two seat convertible with no trunk space, tight leg room, and a rather stiff ride.
My Mom completed the trek from Youngstown to Miami, and I joined him for the ride from Miami to Key West and back again to Ohio. We had no idea why he wanted to make such a long trip. Clearly he had lost his mind. Or perhaps it was because he heard about the Great Conch Republic Drag Race that was happening while we were in Key West. Maybe he wanted to participate in his Corvette!
If he did, my Dad was surely in for a surprise because there are no cars in this “drag” race. That’s right, this was a race of “drag queens” sanctioned by the Conch Republic’s NHRA (Natural “Hot Rod” Association). (The Travel Tart – ha ha, boom boom!)
The race was part of the Key West’s Conch Republic Independence Celebration. That’s right, Key West was once its own country!
It’s a little known fact outside of Key West that the city had a brief sojourn as an independent republic. On April 23, 1982, Key West seceded from the union declaring independence from the United States government under the flag of the Conch Republic.
The secession was prompted by the United States Border Patrol checkpoint that was placed on US Route 1, the only road into or out of the Florida Keys, to check all cars for drug smuggling and illegal aliens. Traffic was halted along with tourism – one of the main trades in the islands. Key West residents figured that if they were being treated like foreign citizens, then they might as well become their own country.
In Mallory Square, Mayor Dennis Wardlow announced that the Conch Republic was a sovereign nation and declared war on the United States government by breaking a stale loaf of Cuban bread over a nearby US Naval Soldier’s head. Of course a minute later he surrendered demanding $1 Billion in foreign aid and war relief to help rebuild the great Conch Republic.
The “drag” race is part of the 10 day Conch Republic Independence Celebration honoring Key West’s brief independence and includes other events like the World’s Longest Parade from the Atlantic Ocean to the Gulf of Mexico, a staged naval battle between United States and Conch Republic war ships (the Conch Republic always wins), an open-air bed race dubbed as “the most fun you can have in bed with your clothes on”, and lots of parties at Schooner Wharf Bar.
The Conch Republic Drag Race!
Beers in hand, Dad and I watched the first few heats of the race. We laughed as female impersonators in high heels, panty hose, make-up, and wigs ran through tire drills, pushed shopping carts around construction cones, and a took a shot of alcohol midway through the race.
The real show doesn’t begin until the last few heats though. All those shots start to catch up with the “ladies” and it gets ugly – skinned knees, hair pulls, and shopping cart crashes!
This is also when Dad maybe had a few too many as well and described on of the drag queens as a “real looker”.
He then asked me to take his picture with her.
Maybe he really did want to participate in the drag race!
(The Travel Tart) – hey, there’s nothing wrong with Drag Queens, they’re a lot of fun. Check out my funny (if somewhat awkward) interview with some cool Welsh Drag Queens! Try not to laugh!